Sunday, September 28, 2014

my study type...

kena atas batang hidung...hahaha sape suruh jawab benda2 psychology nih;pp

my study type:

You Are Intellectual :)

You don't really like to study; you like to learn. You prepare for tests sort of naturally. You aren't one to memorize lots of facts. You just tend to remember what is interesting - and you find a lot interesting. 

You tend to feel unprepared for most tests you take, but you end up doing a lot better than you expect. You're not the type to learn something for a few weeks only to forget it later. 
When you learn, you learn for life.

Like A Star

so...you know you love someone when you can't stand to see them hurting...
i love you people....
my altatayan group...
hope God bless us all...

"Like A Star"

Just like a star across my sky,
Just like an angel off the page,
You have appeared to my life,
Feel like I'll never be the same,
Just like a song in my heart,
Just like oil on my hands,
Honour to love you

Still I wonder why it is,
I don't argue like this,
With anyone but you,
We do it all the time,
Blowing out my mind,

You've got this look I can't describe,
You make me feel like I'm alive,
When everything else is au fait,
Without a doubt you're on my side,
Heaven has been away too long,
Can't find the words to write this song,
Oh...
Your love,

Still I wonder why it is,
I don't argue like this,
With anyone but you,
We do it all the time,
Blowing out my mind,

Now I have come to understand,
The way it is,
It's not a secret anymore,
'cause we've been through that before,
From tonight I know that you're the only one,
I've been confused and in the dark,
Now I understand,

I wonder why it is,
I don't argue like this,
With anyone but you,
I wonder why it is,
I wont let my guard down,
For anyone but you
We do it all the time,
Blowing out my mind,

Just like a star across my sky,
Just like an angel off the page,
You have appeared to my life,
Feel like I'll never be the same,
Just like a song in my heart,
Just like oil on my hands

Thursday, September 25, 2014

so many words


few things going on in my head lately...
and these things are trying so hard to take me off my goals...
GOALS?
yeahhhh bla bla bla...but seriously, we live our life thinking we need to be happy so we don't even wanna spend a day struggling...but struggling is essential...because at the end of the day, that's what you counted on...
i hate to say that for me...the step of 'stick to it' is hard to carry on...
i am totally capable of distraction....
entertainment...
friends...
people...
life management...
that make it so hard for me to focus...
of course it's none of their fault...
it's me...
why am i so easily distracted?
why i let myself be distracted?
it's nearly exam now and look at what i already know now...yeah not so much!
goshhh bring yourselves together sumy!
just stick to it...please! >.<

Saturday, September 13, 2014

when i'm thinking about it...

 "Surgeon can't be lazy, the risks are too great, the seconds we stop pushing ourselves, something terrible happens, something we never see it's coming" _Grey's_

well, all the words above doesn't say anything wrong....every each of the word is true...not just for a surgeon but for everyone...we can't stop pushing ourselves....and here i am...being lazy all day and focus on something emergency but not something important...that's one thing about me joining organization...i tend to care more about that because i'm not good at it...well, that doesn't mean i'm good at academic stuff but i feel safe there...just feel more secure reading Moore's than doing poster or doing fundraising haha okayyy i'm gonna go hit myself with some readings now...just for the love of God, please give me peace and ease for my study...i'm so sick of worrying that it makes me lazy and unproductive! urghhhhh >.<

Tuesday, September 09, 2014

life.update.thinking

hey there bloggers!

quite sometime i'm not updating my blog yea?

hmmmm

so today i feel like typing my heart out! ;pp

been a busy, tiring and confusing week for me, owh scary too! why? we'll get to that...

study wise, hmmm so far so good...i just still feel like a directionless sail...
still figure out what and which to do, to figure out and to plan next...haihhhh
normal...
book, papers, presentation, friends, money and fooddddd
yeah, i have to put food as one of the things i'm thinking and trying about...why?
haha normal issue for me; weight gain >.<

skip that~~~~~

i was bathing just now, and as people say, you often thinking of something new, or getting ideas from there
so do i today...
all of sudden, i'm asking myself, what is my purpose in life?
what do i want?
who i wanna become?
 and am i closer to that?

as i live, now for 23 years...i don't feel like i'm growing...or developing...
i need to develop...like errr more knowledge, more perspective in life, more goals and missions...
i'm just recently....so much going with the flow that i forget what i want, or what i should be doing...

they say people can get lost sometime....
now i feel that way...
feel tired, unorganized, scared, and sensitive....
maybe this is hormone talking (one of the reasons i hate being born as a woman),
but still, i'm thinking about it....

i barely pray....
i barely have real talk with my mum now,
i don't text my friends,
and i'm not focus with tasks in hands...

what am i doing?
why am i so lost?
why am i so distracted from reality?
what happen inside my head?

then i think...think...and think again....
maybe i'm too attached to the world...
when i say world, i means people around...
maybe i'm trying too hard to keep up with the pace and forget what i actually needed to do...

i think so...

maybe i should start with prayers,
calling home, get in touch with friends and try to focus and not running away from my responsibility...
it's okay to get scared right? it's healthy...
well thanks to those who let me walk alone...thanks to those who made me do group jobs on my own...
the stress, whatever that won't kill me make me stronger...
maybe it's time for me to admit i need helps...
maybe it's time for me to contact the world...
yeah...it's time for me to try and get out of my comfort zone...
who say i'll get nothing in return? 
i get to fight, i get to learn, i get to grow and be more positive about life...

people all around me are just like me...there're human who did mistakes and lead a normal life like i do...
so why am i so scared of being weak? everyone is weak....
maybe the first step to become stronger is to admit that i'm weak and working on it...
yeah maybe so...

Give me strength...give me lights...give me spirits to carry on my passions....

sathuk~