when we met....

when we meet those who are far more greater than us...we often go through stages of knowing and acceptance...yeap, i put it this way...just like stages of acceptance... when we see that one person who is so much greater than us, we feel small...we want to be everything like them, we want to be everything but our own selves.... when we see how good they are that we often go through that kind of grieve...grieve and dwelling with our flaws... we blame ourselves on how much not enough we are....we want to be like them, we want to strive like them,...

have you ever been out of brain to think or act for your life?

i am at that stage that im out of brain on how to live my life... money doesnt seem to be enough no matter how much i try to cut my usage... things keep coming for me to just pay pay and pay... no income whatsoever... and im struggling to stay sane throughout this,,,and im certainly not a saint to stay fine 24/7... im tired of being me from time to time...and this might be the most disgusting phase... i just cant wait to pass all of these and have a better life...yeah talk like my life is so much in hell right now...someone is being ungrateful...

How to do this

one thing i dont like having is to have professional situation with my dear ones...because i tend to be serious and turn into a complete different person...and tht will make them hate me...for years of my existence...i have never been able to solve this problem just yet... im 'bipolar' when it comes to jobs...and i just cant be funny or kidding in it...and when i try to...my results gone to hell all because i wanna be polite... #sad #how #Godhelpme...

i'm gonna write something a bit weird today

it's weird because it catches my respect.... i often heard, read or been through those people with hard times and lives and can make it to the top, so they know how to stay humble and respect other people... but one more category that catching my attention are those who have everything since birth, been through every nearly perfect lives, have nearly perfect body, skin, family, friends and conducive environment and country, but....still make it to be such humble, kind, compassionate, and respectful person towards others... this kind are rarely...

burnt out

at certain point of life...you will find yourselves associating with those who are so hard to deal with... those who walk into the room and straightaway burn out all of your mental energy... those who talks negative about themselves and spread all those energy to the whole room... its none of your business to turn them into positive minded...but simply dont make yourselves take it in any of those negative thoughts... simply live each day just to survive those people is really really burnt me out... but sometimes, you just cant choose whom or...

super confused

super confused by my own needs to please my tiredness and to please my hard work....

tht moment

tht moment when you already get used to failure compare to success...yeah tht moment...

it's okay..do it for yourself...

it's okay...your own self is already enough reason fro you to fight, to try and to strive more... for yourself...is already enough....

that moment...

that moment when the selfish ones are tired... and you just...you have no idea what i have been through just to have you in my life....

is there any way out of this?

is there any way out of this? me being selfish and me wanting to be nice in this world... is there any way out of this that can make everyone happy including myself? phrak eii chuai che duai....

i'm sad because

i'm sad because i'm surrounded by people who running around searching for happiness but never once stay with their own selves.... i'm sad because everyone counts little things people do but never count giant things they've done.... i'm sad because all of my life i have known compassion but here it doesn't apply until you're useful... i'm sad because people would rather be rude and seem strong than be kind and seem weak... i'm sad because everyone here thinks they are special and deserve attention but no one actually give any back... i'm sad because...

how

how to stay success when you're everything but happy? how to stay focus and success anyway even when you're full with worries and sadness around your neck? how to stay on the track? when there are millions of reason for you to not ...

how to empty this stupid endless thinking mind?

how to stop thinking about everythi...

don't bother...

i don't even bother praying for the best anymore... its like nothing is getting better... i don't bother doing trying or even striving for better anymore.... yeah people said, everyone fails...everyone gets knocked down... you haven't try my life yet... i'm out of my time, out of my place and out of my reach here... there is signs all over the place telling me to just freaking go home... no matter how much i try...i seemed to be left out and can't catch up here... i'm just too damn scared to try...because i scared of how much it won't be...

Not in good shape

My life right now is not in good shape... Anything anything anything at all can go wrong...anything can happen and nothing seems to make sense... Its no joke how hard it can get sometimes...no joke... And im surrounded by those who are not wasy to deal with either...well we are humans...who can be simple and easy to deal with? But instead of looking at this as a bless...i look at it a curse..a freaking curse... I resent those who doesnt make my life easier...i have a life a living a survive to fight for and for few people they can make it harder...

i will always care...so much

...

Of course

Of course on earth, it's easier to be selfish... it's easier to be bad... to be not considerate... to not wait... to just think about yourself... but that's not the best way isn't ...

so Buddha said....

"You give, no matter how selfish people get, you give anyway" -Buddha- so i have come to understand what this words meant...when i encountered one. For selfish people there is really no other way to deal with them rather than just to give. Because as much as i wish for them to change and pray things will turn out differently, it won't. so, i need to give...because there might seem like i'm at lost here, but maybe some other way, God will grant me with peacefulness of feeling fulfillment...because if i go down to their level and being selfish...

i can live without you before...

i can live without you before... i can live without you now... and in future... i will be fi...

since when?

since when my life gets so boring when it's without y...

i rechecked my lists

i rechecked my "8 type of Toxic Friends" You basically completed 8/8 of them...yeah, science is not kidding...and i shall know bett...

there is

there is reason why God put people in or out of our life.... Trust him...He out of all people will never have bad intention towards you..you know... so stop trying so hard for those who's not in your life, and start try hard for those who's in it... you can do th...

that moment when you want the fantacy to live...forever

how long would this be? how long will i be this happy? i just hope it's long enough... because a person like me...not really lucky...

just really hope...there are some hopes...

God...guide ...

so that's the end of S episode...

yeah it ended...dramatically... and im not saying im hurting or what...im just sad... and might take a while...but one day i'm gonna be able to laugh at this... yes! i'm stro...

so that's the end of S episode...

yeah it ended...dramatically... and im not saying im hurting or what...im just sad... and might take a while...but one day i'm gonna be able to laugh at this... yes! i'm stro...

is there any hope at all?

is there any hope at all that i will be able to grads he...

it's not working...

it's not gonna work...seriously? where do you see yourself in th...

so what now?

so what now? it's such a good week for my fluffy heart...someone is actually wanted to get to know me and be my friend...he wants to go out with me...but for now i'm gonna think that is real and honest ya? i really don't know why am i even spend so much time on him and replying all his texts...he is not even someone i look myself ended up with... i'm not playing game, and i'm still not sure if he isn't... we have like 7 years gap! maybe that's what make me so thrill to see where this is going...it's always been my thing to go out with an older...